Analysis Mode is Temporarily Offline

I’m an analyzer, pure and simple.  I suppose that’s why I love to read mysteries, watch “solve-it” dramas, and like to fix problems (or at least know what caused them).  See!  I even analyze myself!! 

My kids have always been my most fascinating puzzle.  Same parents, two different personalities – from day one .  Growing up, Joe was my independent, would-rather-play-by-myself kid (good thing, since for his first five years of life our nearest neighbor was 70 years old and lived five miles away!).  He has always been easy-going (except for a short lapse in high school that we won’t talk about).  Now a college sophomore, he is thriving in too many ways to count and I am amazed and so proud of the man he’s become. 

Jenna is my social butterfly…always has been and I suspect always will be.  She was (and is) the clown who loved to make people laugh, the actress who could turn any dress-up outfit into princess attire, and the softie who wears her heart on her sleeve.  She’s also the one who will tell you that you are too old to dress a certain way, who will be upfront when something is bothering her, and has a deep faith that I admire.  Unfortunately, like her mama, she is also an analyzer. 

We’ve both had lots of fodder for the analysis mill over the last few years…her type one diabetes on-set, her frustrating path towards a diagnosis of Lyme disease – not to mention the usual growing-up stuff.  What do you think he meant by that?  Do you think she really means this?  We analyze everything to a fault.    I guess that’s our way of acceptance – dissect it, understand it and own it. 

I’m going to try to take my analysis mode offline though for the holidays and just accept life for what it is – messy, unpredictable, and sometimes frustrating.  I’m going to look for JOY in every JOURNEY.  It will be difficult, but I need to do this.  It’s so easy to become a “Debbie Downer” and right now I could sure use a little more “Positive Penelope” in my life. 

I’m already starting…I asked my hubby to bring home some pine from his last trip to our camp – he cut and brought home a tree for our back deck.  No easy task for someone in intense pain waiting for a hip replacement.  Is that love or what?!  My house is strewn with socks, hats, and dog toys – our golden retriever Kara insists on bringing a “present” to me whenever I leave the room and return.  Her whole body wags when she greets me with a smile and a “gift.”  Right now, I have a counter full of dirty dishes staring at me — because we are fortunate to have food to eat.  My laundry pile never stops growing – but at least we have warm clothes to wear.  So many blessings in disguise. 

Even Jenna’s Lyme disease has been a blessing in disguise – and she’ll be the first to tell you that.  Her struggles have made others more aware of the dangers of ticks and led to people getting early treatment.  But it’s more than that.  Her Lyme has made us realize how lucky we are to have wonderful family and terrific friends to support us.  It’s brought the two of us even closer and taught all of us to dig deeper for that extra little bit of compassion and understanding.  We’ve had to learn to slow down and take life one day at a time…one messy, unpredictable, joyful day at a time. 

Now if I could just figure out how to reprogram my procrastinator mode…


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